Montana Sky Eyes

10-23-13

Montana Sky Eyes

I am extremely saddened to be posting this today, but I have volunteered to be the messenger.On October 20th this past week, Pam Manley passed away. I began a journey with her 3 years ago when she lost her son, Adrian (Dei) when he took his own life. I am not sure what to say and how to say it, but a dear friend told me this morning to be sincere, like I always am. I thank him for those words. It seems to make it a little easier. I will try to relay the information the best I can. On the 14th, I received a text from her daughter that she had gone into the hospital with very high ammonia levels in her blood. She was very weak and not able to fight the infections. She had severe liver damage and her kidneys shut down. She was on life support for several days. It was decided to take her off life support on the 20th. Pam and I became very close after the death of her son and also the death of Amanda, my son’s best friend. She really had a tough time coping and coming back from this event in her life, and did not seem to be taking care of herself. Some of us who were close to her, knew she was ill, but she was trying to hide/mask it so no one would worry about her. Well, her body became too tired and shut down. The way I see it, and many others, is that she is now with her son Adrian and her mother as well, and anyone else she has lost or hoped to be with once again. She is no longer in any pain emotionally, mentally, or physically. She can rest now. She can finally sleep. Those sleepless nights are gone. There were no formal services held for her. Her family had a small service of their own and she will be cremated. Adrian is buried in their hometown, and this summer, her daughter will take her ashes to the same location and spread her ashes there where Adrian (Dei) is. This is where she wanted to be, with her son. They will be together again. Please pray for her family during this difficult time. Well, I guess that is all I can say right now. Please know she found her peace. We will never forget her and the impact she had on all of our lives. She was a very special lady and can finally rest.. Rest in Paradise Miss Montana Sky Eyes..

Rosemary

Rosemary was my friend. She started out as my Avon customer. A nice elderly lady I would look forward to visiting every two weeks when I would deliver her order. Our friendship went on for a few years then we moved to Texas. While I have been living in Texas, she passed away from a stroke. I keep in touch with her daughter and we let each other know how we are doing.

I have been thinking about her a lot lately. I have often thought that since I lost my grandparents when I was pretty young that I seem to create a bond or friendship with elderly people. I guess I miss my grandparents. May they all REST IN PEACE.

With this said, I got a fish the other day. It is a female beta colored like a peacock. She is beautiful. I named her Rosemary.

Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Ophelia says, “There’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance.” (Hamlet, iv. 5.)

Bittersweet Spring 2011

Bittersweet Spring 2011

As I look back at pictures I took a couple of weekends ago, I feel such a bittersweet emotion coming from deep in my heart. It has been 6 months since we lost Amanda and Adrian. I know many of us think about them daily and always will. They will never be forgotten and sweet memories surround us, but as I watched Danielle playing in the lake, I saw that she has reached a place of peace after the tragedies. It was nice to see her smile again. I, in turn, felt peace knowing this. I also felt peace knowing that as the sun set, Amanda and Adrian were watching over us. I could feel them in the beautiful sky on this evening.  Please enjoy the pictures in this slide. It was a bittersweet start to our spring/summer, but it will go on. For all of you that has lost someone close, time is the hardest thing to wait for, but time will heal eventually. Love to Pam and Irene, I wrote this for you.

Bittersweet Spring 2011

Mental Day Trip 3-19-11 Part 3

After leaving Pedernales Falls we drove into Burnet, TX and found Falkenstein Castle. This is a private residence but they rent out the castle for wedding parties and private events. Someday I would like to get a look and photograph inside. I hear it is gorgeous.

Mental Day Trip 3.19.11 Part 1

Occasionally when we have some free time, Ken and I like to go on what we call a Mental Day Trip.  This past Saturday we drove north to explore. Danielle and Marley Dog went with us. We had a great day. I wish Jesse had been there, but he had other plans. We hiked to the falls and Danielle and Marley Dog were checking out the river. Pedernales Falls is beautiful.

Bipolar

So many people look at Mental Illness as a weakness and not  a disease. It is a disease. I suffer from Bipolar Disorder.  It took many many years to get an accurate diagnosis and I finally have one and can find some peace in my life. I am not ashamed whatsoever. Some people are alcoholics. Some people have cancer. Then there are the people who battle emotions.  I feel my inner strength because I swallowed my pride long enough to admit I needed help and to get the proper care. Anybody who can not see this needs to get proper education. Here is my disease laid out for you by professionals. Please click on the link and take the next step in understanding more about Mental Health.

Bipolar Disorder